Regaining control of your erection on/off switch doesn't mean much if her sex button is stuck. Luckily, some of the cliched moves men have used to get women in the mood still work—but for entirely different reasons.
Buy Her a Lobster Dinner
Old theory:Your class and taste impress her; your willingness to pick up the tab leaves her very appreciative.
New theory:Lobsters are a great source of phosphorus, the K-Y Jelly of minerals. "Phosphorus is important to help keep the vaginal tissues lubricated," which will help increase her comfort level and desire, says Pamela Madison, director of the Women's Sexuality Center in Santa Barbara, California. Order a side of carrots—beta carotene raises blood levels of progesterone, a hormone linked to increased desire, says Madison.
Old theory:Candles equal romance; romance equals sex.
New theory:Picking the right scented candles can reduce her anxiety and put her in a more receptive mood for sex, says Alan Hirsch, M.D., director of the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago. Go for the aroma of green apples; tests show it's one of the top scents for reducing stress in women. But avoid cherry. "We found that it inhibited sexual arousal," says Dr. Hirsch.
Slip Her a Sex Pill
Old theory:She unknowingly swallows Spanish fly; minutes later, she wants to do the horizontal mambo.
New theory:Tell your partner about ArginMax and maybe she'll slip some to herself. In a study published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, women taking this supplement reported almost twice the increase in sex drive experienced by those taking a placebo.
The secret may lie in L-arginine, one of the pill's main ingredients. "L-arginine enhances the production of nitric oxide, which relaxes blood vessels and could improve desire," says Cynthia Finley, R.D., a nutritionist at Johns Hopkins University Bayview Medical Center.
Re-create a (Hot) Date
Old theory:Makes you look like a sensitive, thoughtful guy.
New theory:Whether you went to the movies or met for coffee, re-create the smell that dominated the date. "If she was sexually aroused by the scent in the past, reintroducing it will create the same arousal," says Dr. Hirsch. That's because the same part of the brain handles scent and emotions. So if you saw, say, Jerry Maguire in the theater, buy the DVD and Orville Redenbacher's Smart Pop Movie Theater microwave popcorn; it has all the aroma with none of the saturated fat.